Prom/Graduation Night
3
Tips for Parents to Discuss Prom Safety with Teens But many parents of
those teens are thinking about different elements of prom.
From official
reports
While it may be unclear if these activities will be a part of your teen's prom night, simply talking with him or her ahead of time may play a crucial role in your teen's safety. [Read about the
reality of drunk
driving on prom night
Parents can engage in
an effective prom safety talk with their teens by following
these tips from D'Arcy Lyness, a child and adolescent
psychologist and behavioral health editor for Nemours'
TeensHealth.org
1. Initiate the conversation: Hopefully by the time a teen is gearing up for prom, parents have already talked with him or her about subjects such as drinking and sex, says Lyness. A conversation about prom safety is an important follow-up, she adds. Parents could start by noting the excitement of prom and how they want their kids to have fun, Lyness says, then transition with something such as: "Prom is also a time when there's a lot of peer pressure to do things, like lose your virginity, or drink, or do drugs, or stay up all night … I want you to have a great time, I want you to have fun, and I want you to be safe." Lyness discourages parents from trying to squeeze this conversation into a busy prom-day schedule. Parents and teens should discuss prom safety a few days in advance, she says, with possibly a small reminder on the day of the dance. 2. Make a safety plan: Parents and teens should discuss what to do in various situations that may arise, Lyness suggests. Consider scenarios such as someone bringing alcohol to the dance, or a friend driving dangerously, perhaps while drinking or texting. Teens who are prepared for these situations will be better able to handle them if they happen, Lyness says. Teens must know that they can and should call parents if they're in an unsafe situation, Lyness notes, and the parents should be ready to answer the call. "Sometimes parents and teens set up a little code call, in which a teen doesn't have to say 'come get me—my ride is drinking,'" Lyness says. Teens can call parents and say a simple, agreed-upon phrase that will cue parents to pick them up. Parents should also set a clear curfew for the teen and establish times when he or she should call home to check in, Lyness says. [Check out
five
ways to save money during prom season
3. Watch the tone: Throughout the talk, Lyness says, "It can help when parents give a lot of credit to their teen, so it's not a conversation where you're talking down to them." Lyness suggests parents begin with, "I know you know these things already, but I think it's a good idea to review them." It can be tough to find a balanced approach. Parents shouldn't lecture or scare teens with gloom-and-doom possibilities, she says, but they also shouldn't be too "friendly" with teens by letting them call the shots on their special night. "The middle ground is where you exercise your parental responsibility of declaring firm, clear guidelines in a caring way," Lyness says. "Not punitive, not harsh, [but] positive expectations." See how your school
stacks up in our rankings of Best
High Schools
School
Nurse: It's Not OK to Give Teens Alcohol for Prom and
Graduation Each year, communities across the country mourn the deaths of teenagers involved in a car crash that resulted from underage drinking at a prom or graduation party. A survey of more than 2,500 high school juniors and seniors conducted in 2010 found that 90 percent believed their peers are more likely to drink and drive on prom night and 79 percent believe the same is true of graduation night. However, only 29 percent of teens say that driving on prom night is very dangerous; 25 percent believe the same is true for graduation night. Adults have to take the lead in making sure that teens don’t get hold of alcohol on these occasions and in educating teens about the dangers of drinking and driving. Parents, of course, are the most important adults in a teen’s life and so must play a key role in making sure their kids don’t drink and drive. Other adults in a teenager’s life, including school nurses and pediatricians, can and should step forward to enforce this message, although it isn’t always obvious to school nurses how they can keep students from drinking and driving. Our community in Erlanger, Kentucky, provides a model of how school nurses can work together with other adults to keep our kids alcohol free. We work with a community group called the Kenton County Alliance on a campaign called “Sticker Shock,” which is designed to reach adults who might purchase alcohol legally and provide it to minors. We go into convenience stores and other places that sell packaged beer and ask them to place a sticker on alcohol packages listing the legal consequences of buying alcohol for minor consumption. It’s our way of reminding adults, including parents, that it’s not OK to serve teenagers alcohol, even if it’s on their own property. It’s illegal no matter where you do it. I like to tell parents that even though it often doesn’t seem like it, your kids really do listen to you. You may think that your teenager is going to do what they want no matter what you say, but you still need to talk to them about the dangers of drinking and driving. Remind them not to get into a car with a drunk driver—and start the conversation before prom night. Other things parents can do include setting a curfew for prom and graduation parties, not allowing your teen to go to a party at a hotel unless you know an appropriate adult is there to supervise, and making sure they know you will be up when they get home. Keeping teens safe at
this time of year is a lot easier if parents, schools and
other adults who work regularly with teens join forces.
Let’s help them have wonderful prom and graduation
memories that will last a lifetime. |
to famous movies, prom is often associated with peer
pressure to drink alcohol, do drugs, drive dangerously, and
have sex.